Holy Shit!

I usually don't do this, but this just scared the crap out of me when I saw it. Am I the only one?

My Profile is My History

Life Again...

LOCATION: Virginia Beach

OK I WILL UPDATE THIS LATER...JUST BROWSING THROUGH RIGHT NOW CHECKING THIS SITE OUT...LOOKING FOR HONEST WONDERFUL COMPASSIONATE PATIENT MAN!ANY OUT THERE?MUST LOVE CHILDREN AND ANIMALS...YOU MUST BE A US CITIZEN, OWN A CAR, HAVE A DRIVERS LICENSE, A PASSPORT WOULD BE A PLUS, HAVE CURRENT EMPLOYMENT, WELL YOU GET THE PICTURE...RIGHT? J/k

8/07 Just came back to this site after a year or so. Some of my friends have met alot of really nice people on here so I thought I would give it a try. So if you tried to contact me before, I wasn't here. I was trying to get my job, house, and other priorities straight! So now that that is taken care of I have extra time to have a life again...

(this lady is on every day. Update the damn thing!)

We Have A Winner!

Nothing screams date me like a picture of you on the shitter.

Irony is Lost on Her

Married and More - 32

LOCATION: Raliegh

I am seeking a warm, kind, white, handsome man over 5'10 who would like an educated, wonderful friend. Ideally you will be over 35 attractive, in a marriage where you would rather be elsewhere- but stay out of duty and children. Ideally you want to see me as much as possible and you are prepared to take a chance at falling in love. You must be disease free, healthy, happy with other aspects of your life and want to meet somebody who is not your average CL girl. Please respond with a paragraph telling me about you. Photos will be treated with absolute discretion.

What's the Point

U can take me home to Mom.

LOCATION: Virginia Beach

I love to laugh and have fun, but I can also be sarcastic at times. I am up for just about anything fun and new. I would like someone that is honest and trustworthy. No games, and no drama. Friends at first is a must, talking on the phone first is a must. I do not want anyone looking for a one night stand or someone who is cheating on his wife or girlfriend.

I like doing just about anything. Movies, bowling, boxing (watching) outings, eating out. I also like staying in and watching a movie, eating at home, sitting in front of a fire. I am not a paid member so I can't receive messages.been there done that

(This person logs in daily)

Are You Sure You're Single?

Maybe it's me, but putting another person in your main picture seems to go against the point.

Sex Sells

For a intimate encounter sure this works, but for a LTR I really don't think so.

Gold Diggers Need Not Apply

You take care of me and we'll get along fine - 26

LOCATION: Miami

Let's meet for coffee and see what you can offer me. I'm 5'7, slim, brown hair and eyes, college student. Looking to enjoy life without just scraping by on my loans.

I Bet This Works Everytime

LOOKING FOR THAT TERRIFIC GENTLEMAN - 39

LOCATION: Albuquerque

Would love to meet a great gent, educated, accomplished, sense of humor and flexible in loving life

I Guess Their Not Paying Enough to Fill Them Out Right

seeking punkrock fireman, or sculptorman. . . - 18

LOCATION: Daytona Beach

Help! I need to move to a warmer climate. Seeking advice and possibly a roommate? I'm a yr old BBW non smoker blue eyes own hair. Looking for LTR with someone who will be my best friend. I appreciate compassion patience spontaniety passion in a man. And honesty of course. My two children are grown and on their own.

Picture Imperfect 12

Maybe it's just me, but this reminds me of Linda Blair in the Exorcist.

It's pretty sad if you need to point out which one of you is the girl.

You don't need to see my face.

I have nice rosy cheeks.

Pay a homeless person to take another picture of you please.

Women of Color 2

Fiona?

And her sister.

And the red girls ...

Looking for Bachelor #4

Oddity, For Seriously Symbiotic Relationship - 26

LOCATION: Philadelphia

I'm not going to make you think I'm sweet all the time. I'm a real woman. We're not all glitter and coconut tanning oil. I can be sweet, and I can make you sweets, but I'm not a very good actress and I dont pretend to like kittens, babies, or sweatpants with words on the butt just to land a man. I like driving fast, I like drinking, I like being a little bit fat as long as I work out and eat correctly and maintain my health. I'm crafty and I have amazing skills all over the spectrum. We're talking magical. I'm adultish, very responsible and mature (but still feel like I'm seven most days), I make more money than most people I know (I always thought ...who cares about money? But apparently some guys do). I'm currently dating 3 different people and hate all of them - give me a reason to cut them all and go with one guy... I need someone who craves me because I dont seek your approval but I want to be around you lots. I want you to want to be around me lots, too. I might sound like I am one of those immature girls who shops only at angry novelty clothing stores and hates the world; but I rather enjoy love, life, and laughing 90% of my awake-time. (The rest of the time, I spend playing practical jokes or kind of zoning out.) I cant sleep right now, and tomorrow I'll definitely feel like wasting time at work in between presentations, so send me something original. Like a joke. Maybe a true story that is wild enough to be fiction. I dont want to hear about your daily routine, how many times per week you work out, or what your hair and eye color is. That can be email number two. Show me the real you.

The Third Person

Singularity seeks Anomaly... - 18

LOCATION: San Franscico

She staggers over words in public, syllables that flow freely in her mind and glide smoothly onto paper spiral out of control when they leave her lips. To shy to party, social anxiety draws her to the corners of the room, and she engages in one on one conversation with an enthusiasm that surprises even her. Doesn’t drink and hasn’t done drugs, she gets high off of books and takes pleasure in staring at the clouds and wondering which ones portend rain, and the fact that even in the smallest scale, there is continuity in the world. Musical tastes spiral out of control, ignoring the lyrics in favour of the feel of the beat and the way it makes her hips sway and her body twirl as she dances like a complete idiot, but enjoys the movement. Books are her one true love, the bibliophile’s room is stacked high with books…and yet out of the chaos of the stacks she can produce any title she wants in a matter of moments. Organized chaos, and really, the floor is just a giant shelf to her. The hermit seeks a male ages eighteen to twenty something (she labours under the delusion that age is merely a number, something that seems to dramatic in the early stages, but as time goes on, seems to lose all importance) that can put up with ramblings about the dinosaurs, and the evolution of man, and commiserate when she wonders what happened to all the smart people in the world. He should be able to ignore a slight case of insanity, and a sense of humour that stems from far too much time spent online. If you believe you can tame a feral geek, please, click the blue email address and send a reply. Like many, she has a myspace. To receive, one must first give.

Picture Imperfect 11

Yes I have a camera, but I don't know how to take face shots.

Come on now. If this is the only good picture of you then you've got bigger problems.

See when you date me you get a whole family. What a deal!

Now did a peeping Tom take this picture? Looks like this guy is in a closet.

Whoops I forgot to wear panties today.

Picture Imperfect 10

See I'm a great date. This guy thinks so.

I'm really not quite sure what this women is trying to say.

Yes if you date me, my breast just might "pop" out on our date.

The women looking for a date is the one in the back. Yes this picture says a lot, that all she has is a head and an arm.

He doesn't know I'm flashing you my boob so he won't know we're dating.

Quantum Physics Anyone?

addictive personality seeks same... - 25

LOCATION: Los Angeles

i see things... i vibrate at a different level... would like to associate myself with those who.. "get it..".. my eccentricity is misunderstood by others, not that it matters. on the other hand, it makes finding others like myself that much more inspiring. i only see the future because all time is happening at once, and when we use a higher percentage of our brains, it is then that we are able to navigate through time and space which are all one... i'd have it no other way... i like them tall, lean, confident, white, and 10- 15 years older than myself...

Picture Imperfect 9

Looking for a new husband. Something sad and tragic is going to happen to this one.

Hopefully the guy in the middle is one of my choices.

Don't mind me I'll wrap myself around anyone.

Is it really that hard to get a picture of you alone.

I'm a nice, laid back, easy going woman. You can tell by this guy's arm around me.

Knowing What You Want

WANTED 1/2 ITALIAN AND IRISH WITH BLUE EYES

LOCATION: San Diego

Hi, Yes this is a little specific. Maybe age 44, reddish hair, blue eyes, rides. Very cute nice and proabably the nicest guy.... Hoping you will say hi.

Picture Imperfect 8

Oo ... oo, I love multiple choice.

Don't mind the guy behind me, I'm going to give him his walking papers. I'd rather be going out with you.

Please don't be married. My last BF was and I had my dog chew his face off.

Picture Imperfect 7

There seems to be a new theme growing. The bonus prize when you date me.

What no food too?

Not quite sure which one is looking for a date. Is it the pseudo lesbian or the one looking like she's going to kick my ass.

If you like this eye you'll love the rest of me.

When Warcraft and Reality Meet

For the Horde! - 41

LOCATION: Portland

Hail! I am a single Blood Elf Warlock, currently residing in an apartment on the SW side of Silvermoon. I made the big move from the Land of Norrath, worked as a Cleric but just got burnt out and needed to make a life change soo here I am! I have tried dating guys I met in Norrath, but somehow it never worked out. The Barbarian Warriors really know how to wear a kilt and fight off a mob, but not into chivalry. My particular attraction to Rangers/Hunters is like chocolate to me.. I can’t get enough. They are very helpful to everyone and willing to be my escort, especially when I can’t read the map or get lost. Hey I am woman, maps tend to confuse me. Tree hugging Druids.. gotta love a man who understands nature and wildlife.. Going into the woods is always a blast and makes it an awesome adventure to see new places untouched by modern man. Then there’s the Bards.. Men who know how to entertain a large crowd, but can make it seem they are looking and singing only to you. They always manage get me to laugh heartily. This being said, I am pretty open minded. Looking for a partner who knows how to have fun, be creative, laugh at himself. Love the woods/great outdoors, artistic, helpful, and musical and be comfortable being a modern man- Oh and loves to wear a kilt! I prefer someone who is a non-smoker and eats his veggies. Most important when he speaks there’s that special twinkle in his eyes that he understands the magic of games.

The Asshole Gene

Sassy, Loud, Sweet.. - 21

LOCATION: Portland

I'm Britney. Hi. :D I not actually sure what I'm looking for. I am sassy and upbeat most of the time, and I try not to dwell on the past to much. I like kittens, and books. I'm a dork. I like orchids and the summer time. I love having fun. I truly believe that if you do something that isn't fun, it's not worth doing. Life is way to short, and to waste those precious seconds on boring smile-less crusades. I love to write, even if they don’t mean anything, just putting my thoughts on paper is what I like. Now, the bad: I smoke cigarettes. I drink accusingly with my roommates. Not a bar kind of girl most of the time, but I could be persuaded if necessary. I’m looking for someone who challenge me, but isn’t an asshole. Now, I understand that most men can’t shake the asshole gene that they have been born with and I can forgive that most of the time. Taller then me is a must, but it’s not to hard since I am short. In the end, I actually looking for someone can actually have me on their mind more then, their job, or car, or ex-girlfriend.

A New Perspective

The book of love is long and boring. No one can lift the damn thing. - 40

LOCATION: Seattle

I'd like a man who appreciates my intellect and isn't alienated by my personality or my ass.

My intellect: JD, grad degree, news junkie, wordplay, writing, history. Perceptive about people and fascinated by their antics. Love visual art and find that if often makes me kind of giddy. My personality: I have a dark sense of humor and a weird ability to get away with telling people the truth when they don’t want to hear it. This makes me a rock in a crisis, but kind of a pain in the ass the rest of the time. I'm irreverent, even when it gets me in trouble. I laugh a lot. Can I be sweet? Yes. Is it my default mode? No. My hair is long and I wear skirts and heels most of the time, but there's an edge in my personality that is not traditionally feminine.

My ass: 31" waist, 46" hips. You do the math. If you're interested: Be interesting. I don't want your stats and a picture. I want a conversation. I tend to like geeks, tinkerers, high-functioning oddballs, and people who can lose themselves in a project or a book.

A Few Sticking Points

punk at heart - 24

LOCATION: Seattle

I have sampled the complete spectrum of what life has offered me so far: everything from life as a spoiled college student with such relatively stupid worries, to living homeless on a river bank struggling to survive. I've made the journey from disillusioned and angry to conforming and adjusting my expectations and standards to live the life I'm told I should live and now I'm on my way back again. I'm looking for someone who has made a similar journey, who knows that life will confront you with situations which provoke constant screaming outrage and demand you to rely on your basic principles of interaction: I'm not willing to compromise anything about myself in order to be considered a a success. The world is a fucked up place and it deserves to incur the disillusionment of enlightened and observant individuals... and the world doesn't owe us a fucking thing. If you can say you feel like this then maybe we could both benefit from having a partner to take on all of ignorant mankind.

Some preferences:
NO FUCKING SKINHEADS~~~ I got red blood in my veins so just walk the other direction
NO SCENESTERS~~~ by which I mean if it's a turn-off that my hair isn't blazing inferno orange, and that I don't look the part of a traditional scenester punk then please let's not waste each other's time

Big bonus points if you are: 1. taller than me (5'8") 2. comfortable playing devils' political advocate 3. established in your life which would help me with some direction I so desperately need It is a very specific person I am looking for so if you think it is you, give me an idea of what is going through your head, and I bet we already have a lot to talk about.

Fairy Tale Romance

seeking bearded overweight hipster - 23

LOCATION: Los Angeles

i realize this is kind of a specific request, but hey, it never hurts to go for what you want. i read this description of north american hipsters, and thought, "you know, that's actually the sort of guy i'm into." should i feel weird that my ideal dude can easily fit into a hilarious stereotype? maybe, but i'm going with it. "Identification: Like a baby bird who has fallen from the nest, a twee twit is simply too soft and gentle for this world. He cannot abide bright colors or harsh materials, so he is usually swaddled in soft, pastel sweaters and corduroy pants. He might have a beard, because shaving is far too scary, and stubble is like sandpaper against his delicate features. He is mumbly and soft-spoken, but he doesn’t mind being unintelligible; he wouldn’t want to impose upon you unduly by putting forward an idea. He’s a cat person. He’s almost too much of a feminist to tolerate the act of sexual intercourse. He’s had the same girlfriend for eight years, and he doesn’t mind the fact that she’s gained a little weight. They throw the nicest dinner parties. "Musical Taste: The twee twit mainly enjoys mellow post-shoegaze in which nothing much happens, gentle American indie-rock in which nothing much happens, and unobtrusive indie-hippie-folk in which nothing much happens. Too much distorted guitars or non-whispered vocals instantly melt these guys. Sigur Rós has some really nice songs, but sometimes they get a little too raucous. "How to Tame a Twee Twit: Give him a hug, or bake him some cookies. If you meet him in a record store, say “boy, I wish all Pavement songs sounded like ‘Here.’” "Benefits of Friendship: Twee twits are pretty much guaranteed to be nice, reliable, steadily employed, and inoffensive. They don’t mind packing a little bit of a paunch, so they’ll be willing to eat greasy diner food with you at 4 in the morning without bitching about gaining an ounce. "Drawbacks of Friendship: Two words: Belle & Sebastian. There’s no escaping the fact that these guys like boring, boring music, and they’re going to get uncomfortable if you blast any crunk in your car (and why even have a car if you can’t blast crunk in it?) If his girlfriend dumps him, you will have to see him cry, and his tears and snot will get all in his beard." ...so if you feel a kindred spirit with that stereotype, please, feel free to message me. we can drink imported beer, be all ironical, watch movies that are way over our heads, give each other mix tapes (TAPES for real, i just bought a 7-pack of maxwell 90 minute tapes at cvs), write embarrassing letters, drunkenly make out, go bowling, cry, whatever. i shop at thrift stores but pretty much only buy shoes and doofy home accessories. i used to have a short, cute haircut, but i'm growing it out and it's in that floppy in-between stage. i have horrible taste in everything. i'm also extremely lazy, which is why i'm ending this ad now. p.s. you don't actually have to be bearded, overweight, or hipstery. just have that general aesthetic (ie "indie rock and diners" over "club beats and date raping drunk chicks") p.p.s. this is the worst personal ad i've ever written. that should give you an idea of the type of effort i'm willing to put forth. hope to hear from you soon!

Picture Imperfect 6

Dating? Yeah right.
Yes I'm looking for a replacement for this guy.
Looking for a new BF with a bigger boat.

Picture Imperfect 5

Now do we get to choose who we want to date?
Is this like a "Where's Waldo"?
Now do we get to go out with both of them?
WTF is she doing and why would she want it as a main picture?
Sorry lady I don't want to go where that thing has gone before.

Low Standards

Seeing where this goes ... ;D - 26

LOCATION: Philadelphia

Alright here goes... Very attractive (not very modest) SWF seeks: An interesting confident intelligent funny downtoearth outgoing charismatic hot guy. Must be: w.pic in the Philly area not a serial killer or rapist. is a super + In return I promise to provide you with a fun easygoing smart original pretty damn normal chick who has not one inch of psycho bitch in her. Send me an attention grabbing email with a pic attached and i'll send one back you won't be disappointed:) Holla back woo woo!

Picture Imperfect 4

Please tell me the one looking for the date is not in the wedding dress.

This was the only picture you could find?

This lady was looking for a friend. WTF?