Fellow Daters

Thursday, March 11, 2010

When People Stop Taking Their Meds

marriage could hv been a perfect word ,I do not know you but I have missed you all of my life. I am getting to a point where I want to meet you and I can't help but wonder when and how that will be. I want to know where you are from and where you are going. I want to know your name and see your face and recognize you. I want to know what you want to be and where I fit into to that. I want to know what experiences you have had that have shaped you and what experiences you still crave. I'm curious as to how you see the world and am eager to hear about everything I have missed up until now.

When I was younger I used to think alot about who you'd be and when I'd meet you. I thought about what I would say and what we would talk about. I always knew that when I found you, we would be so comfortable with each other that it would just be easy. I think you will bring out a part of me that I have only caught glimpses of and have really liked.

Lately I have become more impatient and and have questioned whether you exist. There is space in my life for you that I am keeping open, but I want to know you'll be there soon. I have been growing so much over the last few years and I know I will be easier to recognize because of that. I am becoming the person you are looking for but if we meet too soon, please understand I might not be there yet. What can I do to be that person? How can I make sure you'll recognize me?

I want to know what you're doing right now and if you're getting to the point where you wonder about me. I don't know if there is only one person out there for me, but I know that you are going to mean so much to me that it will seem that way.

I am generally very self sufficient but I am no longer enough for me. I'm not saying you have to fill a void but I miss you and I don't even know you yet. I find myself wanting your advice, your company, your comments, your perception, your love, your touch, your respect and your longing glances. I'm trying to fight the impatience but I know one day, I will not be able to handle being without you. I have seen many people fall in love with those who have been right under their nose for years. I can't help but wonder if we will be that way. Perhaps I already know you, maybe I've thought of you already today, maybe we had lunch or maybe we have yet to meet.

I will not settle, I am far too deliberate in my life and I don't want to waste my time. The opposite of love is indifference and that is the worst emotion to feel about someone. I think I'll know when I find you and so far I haven't had the right feeling but I cannot doubt myself on this.

I'm tired of dating, I want to date you. I know you are incredibly smart because it's what I find most attractive. I know you are kind and sweet and passionate and maybe (hopefully) even a bit nerdy. You're sexy and clever and funny and can keep my attention without even trying because you challenge me. I know you like to travel and want to go to new places together. I know I will be so proud of what you have done with yourself that I will brag and embarrass you, I'm sorry for that. You'll love my friends I promise, I think they too can't wait to meet you. So in the meantime, I am waiting for you. I will always wait for you, but please...... try not to take your time. I'm going to continue on the path I'm on and trust it will cross with yours when the time is right. I'm not sure what sort of temptations I will encounter along the way, but I promise I will do my best. I have this picture of our life together in my head and sometimes I catch a glimpse of other people living it and I know our time will come. I don't care if everything turns out like I think they will, what are the chances of that anyway, but I know we will be happy. We will complement each other and I can't wait to learn from you. Like I said, I'll be here. I want you now, but I know you are worth the wait.

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