The Headliner

• Ashes to ashes; dust to dust; Life is short, so party we must.


• Sensi the night dragon drifted through the sky, her beautiful fragrance charmed those in her wake.


• Turtles are green.


• No, no, no, see-- the pig was on fire WHILE I was chasing it.


• Shake it like a salt shaker.


• Good morning, good afternoon, and if I don’t see you, good night.


• There are 10 pins in my heart....care to go for a strike?


• 2% and I don’t mean milk.


• I’ve got a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.


• If only a closed mind came with a closed mouth.


• Sherlock aint got nothing on me!


• You can’t make me put anything here.


• I never grow older cause I drink from waterfalls.


• Never thought I’d have an admirer from overseas, but somebody’s sending me stationary filled with chimpanzees.


• eenie, meenie, miney, moe; catch this woman by her toe.


• I want Mr. Sensitivity since Mr. Right doesn’t exist!


• Where is my plastic surgeon?


• Did you know that 1 in 12 kids gets their head stuck in a bucket?


• My prince took the wrong turn, got lost, and was too damn stubborn to ask for directions.